Sunday, December 16, 2012

A Heavy Heart

Friday was a day of broken heartedness with the events from Connecticut. We cried on and off in our home most of Friday afternoon and held our girls so close. I know if we didn't have the girls we would've felt grief for the families but having kids, it hit closer to home.

I cried while I watched pictures flash on the screen, listened to a piece of President Obama and watched him cry for the families, when the girls woke up from their naps and then cried again while Daniel and I were talking later that night. It was a hard afternoon.

Thankfully, I find hope in Jesus Christ. Hope amongst the pain and grief. I pray that everyone affected find it too. He's there, waiting on us to find Him, waiting on us to talk to Him. It makes the pain a little easier to bear but the grief for the little ones and their families is still heavy on my heart. And I know it will be for awhile and that's okay. I can cry out to God and know He's there, there's comfort in that. We'll never know why it happened, never know why that young man was so angry he felt he needed to   take the lives of innocent people.

I pray we learn from this experience. Are we doing enough as a community to help prevent this in the future? It's hard to say we're learning when it seems someone is shooting up a school at least once a year or someone is taking their own life because kids are cruel to them. What else can we do? What aren't we doing for our kids that we need to be doing? I hope we take a good hard look and keep this day fresh in our minds so we can be compassionate to those who have a need. We need to see their need and not turn away from it because it seems too hard, too daunting. Intervene and save a lives, not just one but possibly many.

I know I can't save the world and save x amount of children. I do know that I when I see a need I step in and do what I can. In the future the girls will bring home friends that may not come from a loving environment. I know that we can provide one for them. We can be a shelter in their storms of life. I hope that when they walk into our home they know Jesus is a part of our lives and see Him acted out in our lives. I pray that they can talk to us and we can listen and pray with them and for them. I pray we can stop the cycle of hate and neglect in our home, one kid at a time. And even if it only ends up being one child, so be it. Because of that one child how many others can live to see another day and grow up and live the lives their parents imagined for them?

Love starts with Jesus. I can't love others without loving and knowing Him first.

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